 |
| Photo by Trent Chau |
Canyon Call
Dawn comes walking
wrapped in a blue blanket
striped with red purple and gold
shaking bells.
A silver snake sprawls her sinuous curves
amongst the ashen hills,
winding towards turquoise mountains
under a wet misty sky.
Four insects swarm up sides as sharp as shrapnel
to stand and point and murmur
and fidget a bit
in front of the gods.
Riding bareback on green winds, their fingers
deep in the sleeping earth,
the gods have no time to listen,
though dimly they sense a presence.
They’re too busy making water and feathers,
rabbits for coyotes, and grass for rabbits, mountains for time
and riddles for humans
to stop when they aren’t called.
Written for One Shoot Sunday at the inimitable One Stop Poetry
slightly revised 11:27 am
Love the imagery - the blue blanket, the silvery snake, the insects fidgeting. Well done.
ReplyDeleteOh Yeah. I'm loving the first, second, and last stanzas in particular. You made this grand vista more alive by bringing out its particulars.
ReplyDeleteAnd...I love that the snake is a she.
beautifully done! Great imagery!
ReplyDeletethank you
Stunning imagery... love the sinuous curves of the silver snake... Beautiful expression.
ReplyDeleteThanks all. @FB, Had to put a small tribute in to the goddess, after all that important male mountain god stuff going on.
ReplyDeleteSlightly revised to remove a very over-worked word, 'splendor."
loved this ~ too busy for spectators
ReplyDelete'silver snakes' 'grass for rabbits'
'mountains for time'
they's seen it all ~ lovely imagery ~ so fresh ~
I could almost capture that mountainous air
(heehe *smile* @riddle re fish?)
~ Lib ~
Brilliant write ...many layers, beautiful infusion of imagery. "Though dimly they sense a presence," that line gets to me, as does the entire poem on a gut level.
ReplyDeleteSome nice imagery and alliteration. Interesting sense of gods doing busywork and not necessarily at God's call.
ReplyDeleteThank you for visiting WWP and commenting on my poem.
loved the images here, and the middle stanza particularly - insects fidgeting in front of the gods... beautiful
ReplyDeleteI especially love the first two verses, describes the picture prompt perfectly.
ReplyDeleteI love the images here.. the first stanza especially... I also love the last lines
ReplyDelete"mountains for time And riddles for humans"
great write... enjoyed reading it.
I love reading your poetry, gentle salute to the dawn!
ReplyDeleteYou made it all come to life. The attention to the little things makes the world a more beautiful place, I think.
ReplyDeletevivid imagery,
ReplyDeletemagical writing.
Thanks so much, everyone. Your comments and thoughts are always appreciated, and they mean a lot to me. Glad you all could take the time to come by.
ReplyDelete