I wrote this 55 last week, and what a perfect day to post it, with a Happy rewritten Ending, as former Republican presidential candidate Rick Perry at last surrenders to the inevitable and goes back to make life in Texas hell, instead of persisting in his bid to do so for the entire country.
An Unfortunate Happening On the Stump
I don’t know why
you came today
I only wish
you'd go away,
you came today
I only wish
you'd go away,
hair pouffed-up
in 'Statesman Grey;'
when your jaw moves
--instant replay.
Now it seems
my wish I'll get
you're finished, smoked
as a cigarette.
Your botoxed eyes
can't express dismay
but they weep--for the money
you just threw away.
in 'Statesman Grey;'
when your jaw moves
--instant replay.
Now it seems
my wish I'll get
you're finished, smoked
as a cigarette.
Your botoxed eyes
can't express dismay
but they weep--for the money
you just threw away.
January 2012
Biting Political Analysis for the G-Man
Image courtesy Pundit Kitchen, at I can has cheezburger?
In case you haven't heard this today...you're freaking awesome! And I LOVE the tag "no intelligent lifeforms" and "born to run away". Yup, couldn't have picked a more fitting piece...says the chunkymonkey on the other side of the border! :)
ReplyDeleteHe's not ashamed to admit that he's a failure!
ReplyDeletePssst. Hey Rick...you have to give back the Brokeback Mountain jacket, now.
I love it! The title made me laugh, and then you reeled me in the rest of the way. A pox to republicans!
ReplyDeleteWith Rick's departure...
ReplyDeletePreceded by Michelle B's quitting
And Newt's philandering...
It sort of makes Mitt's Cayman Bank Account the next topic of discussion.
Let me warn you, Sarah's waiting........
Loved your Politico 55 Hedge.
Thanks for playing, thanks for sharing your glee with us all, and have a Kick Ass Week-End
Yes, it's sad that all the crazy ones are dropping out first--they're way more entertaining. But you're scarin me with the Sarah thought. (That would be the Delusion-ati vote, right?)
Deletehaha how apt! I am blissfully unaware of American politics, but that aside - this is a great piece! a 55 word poem would finish me off I fear ha, yet you wrote this so effortlessly and I loved this line "you're finished, smoked
ReplyDeleteas a cigarette." - brilliant line! Nice writing!
Thanks OT--and "blissfully" is def the right word.
Deletegreat title, it boggles my mind the amount of cash these people use to try to get elected
ReplyDeletelol...awesome tag at the end there...and one down...now only how many to go...the two front runners are frickin imbeciles...out of touch with reality so...nice one hedge...
DeleteGosh what will the botox industry do without a person in office promoting ...
ReplyDeletemy link is here
Your politics are sure fun to watch...I just love the way you wrote..you're finished..like kaput, the end..he..he...
ReplyDeleteHa! He is pretty entertaining. I've gotten to feel sort of sorry for him. (Not when I think about capital punishment, however. But when I put that far far away in my mind.)
ReplyDeletehair pouffed-up
ReplyDeletein 'Statesman Grey;'
when your jaw moves
--instant replay. -- that was awesome, hedgewitch (and the photo had me laughing out loud!)
hee hee hee,
ReplyDeleteeven this conservative gal is chuckling!
(Note: Conservative...NOT Republican)
I love it! Well done and perfectly timed.
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks for your fun submission to last week's Limerick-Off.
I, too, am not up on the latest political wranglings - but I could feel the bite of the words from way over here. I do like a bit of political satire with my poetry!
ReplyDeleteThere are random acts of cosmic kindness, like those quarks that strafed Perry's brain during the debates and made a Texas juggernaut go "Wha?" Probably too much too expect from the heavens (I didn't say Heaven) for the general election, but the way the surviving Republican candidates are sassing each other, the party faitfhful's collective brain may just simply implode. -- What was that? That happened 30 years ago when Ronald Reagan batted his purdy eyes? Oh well ... Still, we can dance a bit today, singing "Ding Dong the Saddle Itch is Gone!" - B
ReplyDeleteYou slay me, brother. This *has* been a great week for us political junkies of the pinko commie persuasion. Between Newt's open marriage issues with his second and third wives, and Richie Rich..I mean Romney's open marriage with his money, all I can say is, the hits just keep on comin.
DeleteDang, HW, ya know I'm loving this one. Would've loved to see what vid you would've tagged withit! (not that you needed music to help fuel this fire!) anyhoo, another day, another debate and I say they just need to start over! I see the son rising soon, ya know the one, recount...ha!
ReplyDeleteI've no idea what's going on in US politics, but it seems like a lot of people are getting upset over it.
ReplyDeleteMy 55 are here: http://jobbingwriter.blogspot.com/2012/01/fff55-near-miss.html
I'm not politically inclined, but enjoyed this very much. Particularly "you're finished, smoked/ as a cigarette). Great write!
ReplyDeleteHa, awesome! And the rhyming makes it even more taunting.
ReplyDeleteStill, the biggest head-scratcher about all this is that none of it matters. So what if Ritchie Rich pays fewer taxes than his bottom-wiper and poison-taster combined, or that Newt announced he was divorcing Wife #1 when she in the hospital with cancer, or to No. 2 while she'd just come down with MS and ignorant of the fact he was banging an intern whilst adjudicating a President for banging an intern ... None of it matters, -- as long a white person goes back to the Oval Office. Sigh. The hits keep coming ... but who cares?
ReplyDeleteIt's always been all about that, ever since the inauguration. And so you get candidates like the present zoo--who are just slapped together caricatures, because they know no matter who runs, the 32% bigot vote is going repub. So this is all a dog and pony show to entertain the Fox news-isized brainwashed and pander to the lowest common denominator (and it don't go no lower, dude)of the all-white Tea Party. It sells cornflakes for Rush and Rupert Murdoch, or Lipitor and Cialis and cars, or whatever is filling their pockets. Not one single candidate has any policy that will do one damn thing but suck more juice from the bottom and feed it to the top intravenously through the tax code and dismantling the social safety net.
DeleteSo the least I feel I can do is get some entertainment out of it as I fiddle while DC burns. ;-)
Yeah, the GOP freakshow is entertaining as all. Fantastic fun and politically correct, in my opinion, 55.
ReplyDeleteGood, timely read. Thanks for the smile!
ReplyDeleteHa ha! Loved it.
ReplyDeleteI love this! I am already ready for the elections to be over.
ReplyDeletePointless lying fools... far too many and they make money-
ReplyDelete* Sigh*... Nice poem, with rhythm, rhyme.
Well done! (and well rid of him!)
ReplyDeleteThis ditty could be about the other side just as easily. "Statesman Grey" was pretty clever!
ReplyDelete