Yes and No
By Moonlight
You wrote on my lips
the summer’s ending
stitched dry leaves
across my lids
in the cooling dark
and I said Yes.
You poured the moon
for my thirst
brimful with loss;
I still remembered
summer's
melon taste.
summer's
melon taste.
In the dream
you bought me,
time stands still
no matter how often
I say No.
March 2012
55 drops of ice cold moonlight for the G-Man
Image: Moonlit Landscape, Camille Corot, oil on canvas, 1874
Public Domain, via WikiPaintings
nice...the first 2 lines are stellar...love them..and it rolls nicely from there...time standing still in the dream given...i could go one or two ways...either a positive or negative way here...stuck in a moment...can go either way...but i like...smiles.
ReplyDeletesee made up for yesterday by being first today. smiles.
DeleteThanks Bri--I worry when you don't make it early, esp knowing what you were dealing with yesterday, and yeah, I meant this one to be ambiguous.
DeleteSigh...
ReplyDeleteI'm always amazed at how much substance you can pack into 55 words. This one is layered with the dichotomy of love.
ReplyDeleteAre you writing this from Australia?
ReplyDeleteIt's Spring Hedge!!!
But even though you may have Seasonal Dyslexia, it was Beautiful
Loved your 55 Joy.
Thanks for keeping your word
Have a Kick Ass Week-End
yeah, pretend you don't know what a metaphor is--you aren't foolin me, Galen--and I always keep my word, it's a Capricorn thing. ;-)
DeleteWow, you hit this one out of the park, kiddo. I especially love "you poured the moon for my thirst brimful with loss. Sigh. Such an ache.
ReplyDeleteThere is such pain in this one but written so beautifully. There is so much to like in this one..."you wrote on my lips...you poured the moon..in the dream you bought me"
ReplyDeleteand the Corot sets this off nicely
ReplyDeleteSadly beautiful. Love the last verse, especially buying a dream where time stand still. I need one of those.
DeleteJA...
ReplyDeleteSometimes I play Dumb.
Sometimes I'm not playing, I Am!
But, I'd rather be Enigmatic...:-)
Hmm sounds familiar.."occasionally dumb, always enigmatic"--I think I need the T-shirt.
DeleteThis is gorgeous, hedgewitch. That first stanza - such stellar imagery! I loved this.
ReplyDeleteI love the title, and the way the poem is out together to play that out. It's dreamy and sad and soft and perplexing, just as dreams, and love, so often are.
ReplyDelete"put", not "out".
DeleteThis moves beautifully.
ReplyDelete"in the cooling dark
and I said Yes."
That feels so bittersweet.
I like the way the last stanza answers the first and puts the poem to rest. Verily nice, methinks!
ReplyDeleteI like the yes and no playing against each other with the seasonal images....Packs a punch in 55 words ~
ReplyDeleteAh, this is wonderful. Your shorter poems have an altogether different feel than your longer works. I love them all, but tonight this appealed ever so....
ReplyDeleteGreat writing. Not a word wasted and lovely imagery.
ReplyDeleteSome memories are hard to forget... I think a part of us always yearns for things in our past (whether they are good for us or not!)
ReplyDelete