Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Skywriting





Skywriting


Crows sky high
above the blank road
eighteen wings
trampoline
into parabolic glides
brash applause of caws


Push of wind
today's instructions
       marked in black      
crow letters
  against a chalkboard of cloud
fly away, cry high


April 2011





Posted for  OneShotWednesday  at the inimitable OneStopPoetry




47 comments:

  1. I LOVE this! The photo is fantastic, but I would love the poem even without the amazing visual. I believe this may have just become my favorite piece of yours.

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  2. 'applause of caws' from me for this flight of fancy!

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  3. I love this one so much, bird and sky-lover that I am. Especially "crow letters against a blackboard of cloud, fly away, cry high". Wonderful.

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  4. "Brash applause," indeed ... somehow I think of a bewitched spring moment, sky yellow, threatening (twisters up in your neck of the country today, right?), the horde of black omens lifted and hurled far by the wind. Something is tightened and so ready to spring, fling, fly here .... Hope you aren't holding your breath. - Brendan

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  5. can hear the 18 sounds they make- and more... Great One, HW!

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  6. Great reversal of the cloud being the chalkboard making the "parabolic glides" prominent. That's such a smooth phrase in fine crafted shadormas. Powerful symbolism as well. 18 wings makes me think of tractor trailer trucks above that blank road, as well as the free flight of traditional hovering omens. A dark, beautiful poem.

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  7. There's a staccato-like sense to the words that makes them sound like the cries of crows. Excellent!

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  8. Enjoyed your two-part Shadorma very much. A great form for writing, requiring concision and strong imagery to work well, as yours does. Great cadence.

    Excellent!

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  9. Melancholic but nicely melancholic, excelent image for the poem. They are together making a complete impression of the noise. I can hear crows in my silent room.

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  10. Oh, I love the imagery of this piece. I could see your word painting clearly, succinctly, powerfully.

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  11. love it hedge, the first part more than the last just cause i have a thing for trampolines of course...but i could see it...and just hope they dont run their talons down the chalkboard...

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  12. I too hear the caw of a crow. wonderful job. :)

    my post this week

    silent lessons

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  13. I love the cadence of this. It just sings!

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  14. This is as wonderful as crows are entertaining.

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  15. HAHA! Brian: run their talons down the chalkboard!

    I love birds--all 'brands'.
    Fly little bird
    Fly with the wind
    If you do not
    You have sinned....

    NICE OSW...glad I'm 'in' this week
    <a href="http://stfourthdimension.blogspot.com>HERE</a>

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  16. oh yes, marked in black crow letters...that is a wonderful description of the their flight....love to see them gather at night....bkm

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  17. I love crows. That probably says something about me! You've given us a different sort of a view of them here, Ms. Witch. For some reason, my favorite line is the "eighteen wings." Leave it to you to see it fresh like that.

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  18. So beautiful, hedgewitch. A flock in flight is always mesmerizing.

    "crow letters" - I LOVE that!

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  19. I love the pic and the words - beautiful !

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  20. stripped down to the essence of poetry...and still satisfies in it's simplicity...because of the strength of it all.

    Marvelous poem. Haunting, too.

    Lady Nyo

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  21. I love crows ... I have not written for a while. I think that I have a poem that begins: "Crows fly high." Now I will have to search for it. You know, this poem just might inspire me to write again!

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  22. Enjoyable poem...I can hear their brash applause of caws.

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  23. I shall think of your poem every time I reach the end of the lane where the rooks are nesting in a large oak. Title perfect.

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  24. i have fallen head over heals for that photo...

    just adds so much visual to your emotive words

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  25. I have the same problem in commenting on your work-- stunned into silence. This is deeply evocative to me-- the idea of sky writing and the crows calling to each other, the instructions-- something that we would glance it not really observing and here so beautifully distilled, a cry of the heart. BTW you gave me thoughts re revision...xxxj

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  26. Evocative 'snapshot' of the moment with a resonance beyond

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  27. A murder of crows making black crow letters send shivers up and down my spine :)

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  28. I bet they are on their way to a MURDER!!!

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  29. wonderful rhythmic prose, well done!

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  30. REDRUM! (LOL!)

    Great description of crows as black letters against the chalkboard clouds.

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  31. I really like this - crows writing messages on the sky - a lovely idea. I have learned to love crows since I learned that they never leave one of their own to die alone...such loyalty.

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  32. Hedgewitchery with crows in a perfect shadorma. I love it!

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  33. oh - you paint with words hedgewitch...amazing piece...love the chalkboard clouds and the picture is just amazing

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  34. Perfection is what you always achieve in any form, Joy! I love how the crows in this poem 'write' instructions in a sky we hardly ever look up to see much less to find coded messages. But indeed the sky is a 'chalkboard' and the crows, for us, just crows. If we could but borrow other minds like the crows' perhaps? Thanks again for a poetic experience that allows me to plumb my own depths as always.

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  35. Excellent!!! love this phrase "brash applause of caws"

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  36. Superb. I love the picture too!

    Here is my one shot:
    diamonte

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  37. 'fly away, cry high' ~ there is something so beautiful in that one...i find crows fascinating, almost magical, ergo, your words capture me...excellent use of shadorma form, an inspiring write ~ (that pic is fabulous!)

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  38. A truly impressive write. It is authentic and original, demonstrating a wonderful economy of language and great talent. I enjoyed it immensely, James.

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  39. captivating image even made more fascinating by its verses

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  40. A wonderful bright shiny thing!

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  41. love crows and love the idea of them 'writing' across the skies. wonderful.

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  42. Many thanks, everyone. Your time and feedback here is always appreciated. This was a good week for one shots.

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  43. They say crows are one of the smartest animals. They can use tools, they think faster than the great apes, they remember longer than elephants. They're getting lost in the ecosystem. To think BILLIONS of people and we're losing crows (but we're not losing insects). Time again to count them in! These shadormas are addictive, aren't they? Deft use of them here, wonderful Hedge.
    Gay

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  44. Succinct and delightful. The whole second stanza is stellar.

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'Poetry is an echo asking a shadow to dance' ~Carl Sandburg