Sunday, June 19, 2016

Dreamless



Dreamless




We don't discuss which one is blacker
the starstrewn night or sister death
balanced here on living's edge.
Death has no moving moon
no firefly's strobe,
still we say she
comes all this
way with
sleep.



~June 2016









posted for   real toads














Images: Untitled by Zdzisław Beksiński, fair use
Deadlight, © joyannjones







18 comments:

  1. Hey Joy, a very unique and well-wrought comparison that despite its opening darkness describes boons-- the sleep of death an intense counterweight to the lightness of the moon and firefly strobes. I don't remember what that form is called but the rhyme works super well not coming as an endline. Thanks. K.

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    1. It's a nonet, k. Syllables counted down from nine to one. Thanks!

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    2. Thank you, for the name. The name of the form itself fits the subject--ha. k.

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  2. Nonet is a fine charm here, winding down to a stillness balancing on a void -- the black reverse triangle this rests upon. "Dreamless" is surely deep-in sleep, and you name her abyssal sister well.

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  3. To mimic is not to be the thing mimicked, and so I don't think they are the same at all, though certainly they may be degrees of each other. beautiful as your work always is, and I love it when you school us all on what to properly do with form.

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  4. The form is perfect for the comparison. The shape leaves me thinking that although Death and Night are so different, when all is done, they both speak of endings... even if one starts over. Then again, who really knows whether or not the other is a true ending, too...

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  5. I like the way the lines take on a funnel like appearance with the words draining away, like life into sleep or death.

    Thank you for coming out to play, and for sharing, too, the amazing artwork here featured.

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  6. Wow, these brief lines pack a powerful truth!

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  7. The way if narrow down is like being throttled, for that breath of a darkness that mimic the night. Sisters yet so much apart.

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  8. Oh I have come back after having just posted mine, and see we had somewhat similar trains of thought.

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  9. I like the idea of Death travelling from afar, making a special journey. Clever.

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  10. I love the form you used..and Like Kerry I see it as a funnel. What are we pouring ourselves into? Where will we end? Incredible writing.

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  11. I really like your words and form and the truth within. I do hope I die in my sleep (but not for a good while yet).
    Anna :o]

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  12. form! and not even the fib(onacci) that you first used to lure me deeper into the garden.

    I've been seriously considering leaving real toads, shutting down my blog, saying fuck you to the writing gods (and everything else save labor and parenting)... but maybe not.

    maybe not, when you illuminate that razor's edge between those two blacks. makes me want to take a peek again, maybe. ~

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    1. I hope you never do, but you know I know the feeling, M--it's the call of the void, so easy to slip into the real world and shut the door on this difficult torturing thing called writing--sometimes so easy and purely pouring, but more often a fistfight, a martial arts stand-off with Bruce Lee, or a light saber duel with a Sith lord who cheats really well...but you know when you try to give it up, it just gets worse. Or so it does for me, anyway. Do what feels best, is my advice. Decisions make themselves that way.

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    2. Oh, and thank you so much for your words here--they help.

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'Poetry is an echo asking a shadow to dance' ~Carl Sandburg