Objectivist Free Will Bootstrap Nightmare
Last night I dreamed
Rand Paul walked up to me
as I sat working at my desk,
in his suit and wide red tie,
curly hair oiled
like a delicate machine.
He tipped up my chin, grasped it firmly
and planted a kiss on my lips
while I froze.
"My god," I whispered,
"I've kissed a libertarian."
and sunk my face in my palms.
A wave of shame consumed me,
as I sat deregulated,
more broken than an oil spill;
Mr. Paul smiled a small
bomb-thrower's smile,
and walked on to the next desk.
~ January 2015
slightly revised, July 2023
old jokes posted for the desperate satirists at
Images/memes via internet Fair Use
Compact and sweet piledriver of a satire, Hedge. Florida is rotten with libertarians who want all their pleasures free and without consequence, riding helmetless into the apocalypse. DeSantis plays relentlessly to them when he's not spewing vile on gays & blacks. Love the tart details, the lead meme (amen), Rand Paul's hair "oiled like a delicate machine," the kissed speaker sitting ashamed and "deregulated, / more broken than an oil spill." In small confines such walloping KO chops. You tread on them to our great satisfaction. Mitch McConnell stood there speechless.
ReplyDeleteThanks B. A Mitch without words is a blessing to all. And deSantis trying to up his cred by espousing RFK JR for the CDC. It just boggles the mind that we're here, now, jumping off this particular idiotic cliff. I have a wild morning (ie, dealing with other humans) but I will be by to visit all the other satirists as soon as I can. I've read yours--they're excellent--and will comment soon.
ReplyDeleteNightmare indeed. Love the Colbert afterword. I miss him with the strike going on.
ReplyDeleteA horror story in a way, a poem that leaves an oily residue. "more broken than an oil spill"....brilliant. JIM
ReplyDeleteBrilliant use of description and feeling in this Joy! I love "curly hair oiled like a delicate machine"! Thank goodness it was only a dream! Hope all is well with you these days my friend.
ReplyDeleteThe rogue! Actually, you were kissed by a libertarian! Unless you were come-hithering him! He sounds a bit slimy if you ask me :-) By the way, I love the title and your labels underneath :-)
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