Ice
I dreamed a life where being was enough,
where the past was only compost-covered snow
hard frozen but remote and not renewed,
saw verdant in the end a green sheathed globe
with a cold that didn't matter at the core.
But dreams dissolve, while winter has a way
of building ice that overtakes the clay.
~February 2013
55 icicles for the g-man
Hover mouse for image attributions or click picture to go to photographer's page at flick'r Creative Commons
That's the truth.
ReplyDeleteit is going to annoy G Man that I got here first!
I enjoy your ending couplet-the clay surprised and delighted my senses. There is profound beauty in your opening line. The whole piece is full of colors and tactile information. wonderful.
ReplyDeleteice is a part of the dream where being is enough
ReplyDeleteShay...?
ReplyDeleteShouldn't you be doing dishes or something constructive?
Joy, week after week you never fail to thrill and amaze.
I'm truely blessed to know you.
Loved your chilling 55.
Thank you for this Top Notch work of Art.
Have a Kick Ass Week End
You better run and hide!
DeleteLoved it.
ReplyDeleteice that overtakes the clay....really nice closure on this hedge...if only that first line/first dream could be true, you know...smiles.
ReplyDeleteThat first line just grabs you. I really like this.
ReplyDeletewinter has a way... (one reason I moved to NC)
ReplyDeleteAnd I, too, melted into that first line.
Very pretty poem. It made me a bit sad. And I LOVE winter, it still made me sad.
ReplyDelete*shivering* Ice has it's magic...and you captured that, hedgewitch.
ReplyDeleteI'm tired of the stuff, though, and am now starting to really fantasize about spring.
Me, too, and we've had much less of it here--but this is the time of year I miss the garden most.
DeleteThat's quite a dream. Excellent write.
ReplyDeleteI swear those looked like frozen green beans under ice! This kinda reminds me of that John Lennon song. Your last two lines are simply divine.
ReplyDelete(sorry for the deletion but typos would be a smear on such a lovely blog)
No problem--I'm always deleting my worst typos. Thanks, Yvonne.
DeleteHi Joy - a lot of wonderful reversals here - well, not in the first line, which is as Jane says profoundly beautiful, and kind of a universal dream (or should be, I think), but then you get into these very unique reversals of the norm - the compost covered snow, the cold at the core that doesn't matter, all these things that are the opposite of the visual and accepted norm - and even the dream dissolving is what ice typically does, so it's another reversal - as if the dream and the green are all taking on the qualities of the cold, while the ice is what's composted and reproductive and sculpting. Ouch. Well done. (G-Man right.) k.
ReplyDeleteThanks very much,k. Your eye is faultless. Hope your move is approaching its final stages.
DeleteBut dreams dissolve, while winter has a way
ReplyDeleteof building ice that overtakes the clay.
I marvel at the whole lead up to these last two lines, which for me, have all the punch of an epigram.
Thank you, Kerry. After so many years of struggling horribly with it, I now find I sometimes compose in iambic pentameter without even thinking about it--very weird, but goes to show how one's brain can adapt to anything. ;_)
DeleteOh boy and when it overtakes the clay! watch out for ethereal beauty! thanks-
ReplyDeleteYou do know how to hit the essence of truth, melodically and convincingly.
ReplyDeleteLove the icy 55. I can only imagine the beauty of a life where there was nothing to do but "be".
ReplyDeleteWinter sure is having its way here today. Love this icy 55 Joy. But then I just about always love your stuff...even the stuff you take down! (ahem, like your toad house)
ReplyDeletebeautifully written, Joy - and oh, how this poem fills me with longing for that world, or life, where being is enough
ReplyDeleteThis is my new favorite of yours, Joy. Love the dream of "being" being enough. The closing couplet is spectacular.
ReplyDeleteNice top photo -- Flickr blows it up well, but looks not like water ice -- perhaps methane ice on jupiter?
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeletehey hedge
this totally chimes with my current state and outlook:
stroking my melancholy man . . .
some superb phrases that really kick like velvet shod mule
compost-covered snow
a green sheathed globe
but the master stroke bites at the bitter end
. . . dreams dissolve, while winter has a way
of building ice that overtakes the clay
the cold climate has an efficient way of reminding me
of my former, full contact livelihood –
PAIN!!!
Still, at least it matches my inner-frostbite!
All the best Joy
Hope you are well.
really beautiful..."compost covered snow"...
ReplyDelete