(For the Man Who Told Me Never To Write Down His Name)
Back when I was
I loved you.
I saw you as the pathfinder
alone among men known to
disarm the plaint of the frog sentinels,
and allowed to pass the trees’ seedlings
covered in their rustling beds, soundless,
walking like a snowflake over the breasts
of sleeping wrens,
sent to pull me from
the ooze and gel of the mire.
but what a cost.
your beaded moccasins,
your pipe and pelts, your mule.
my pain only to see it
found in a new spot,
coming up like the weed it is
needing always to be pulled
You moved on
to another frontier of lost
but far from fallow women,
that ever expanding horizon.
I think you walk there still, quick and
soft as the memory of a
leaf that never falls.
Posted For Poetry Potluck at Jingle's, Monday, November 15, 2010
Image: Shotgun Hospitality, by Frederic Remington
Source: wikimedia commons
I knew a man like this once. The qualities and the way you express them - just perfect and beautiful (and more than he deserves)ReplyDelete
My pain only to see it
Found in a new spot,
Coming up like the weed it is
Needing always to be pulled
Forever." -- the best description of disenchantment I've ever read.
I see your view,ReplyDelete
dynamic and vivid words..
Oh I hate commenting after my friend Talon. She always gets to the heart of a poem, yes she does. She's like you, in fact. No nothing-comments from either of you. Makes me love you both, truly.ReplyDelete
I liked that same section, about the pain coming back like the weed that it is. Don't I just know it.
I also really like "the frontier of lost but far from fallow women." I know that place. I live there.
PS--Wake up, little susie. I want to know what you think of my new poem.ReplyDelete
@FB Thanks--you & your juju cowgirl got my mind back in that wild west place this poem came from. Comments on the new one at your place up now.ReplyDelete
@TALON: Thanks and like Fireblossom, I appreciate your commenting style, it takes time, and it helps. Much appreciated. Re: the Nameless Scout,I think they all deserve something if they teach a good lesson, even if the lesson is unwelcome at the time.
@Jingle: I don't know how you find the time to read so many poets, but thank you for keeping me on your reading list.
enjoyed this very much
Wonderful visuals...your words are a definite treat for the eyes.ReplyDelete
Wonderful talent here ... your attention to detail and form...love it all, my mother was raised on the reservation this one hits home....blessing..bkmReplyDelete
Hello, How exciting to land on your magical poetry land.
Hope you well.
I am inviting you to join us for poetry potluck fun. If you already link in poems, enjoy treats from fellow poets.
Beautiful. I liked it very much.. Ending was beautiful...ReplyDelete
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
wonderful poetry. grew up in the southwest and this took my back there... nice job!ReplyDelete
You say you envy my whimsical style, but, if I may say, I envy the profoundness of your own style. You kept your theme from start to finish and like poetry should be, left it open for interpretation.ReplyDelete
Big thumbs up.
P.S. Thank you for leaving the link! I don't find it a bother and it helps me reply quicker and helps you with your traffic.
@Panda Wolf Many thanks for the graceful return-of compliment. We are what we are I guess, but that doesn't stop us from lusting after what we ain't. Glad if the link is a convenience--always feel like it's spamming. ;-)ReplyDelete
And many thanks to all who've taken the time to stop by and leave their thoughts.
An infectious read, it took me back to when I was a lad observing the folks that came yearly for the rodeo - and the inevitable discomfort of the temporary affairs of the year before coming face to face with the ones of that year.ReplyDelete
I like the metaphors you used here and the images created by your words. A sad yet not bitter remembrance of a past love, this is a very good poem about love and loss.ReplyDelete
this is just wonderfully written. you have captured some very powerful thoughts quite nicely.ReplyDelete
thanks for linking up with potluck.ReplyDelete
award/treats for you. smiles.
let me know if you wish to contribute to Poets Rally week 33.